Hmm, lucky readers, another post THE DAY AFTER I LAST POSTED ONE?! Well aren’t you in for a treat! (Hopefully).
So as I sort of touched on yesterday in my last post, I’ve been in a bit of a quandary with Jesus and feeling a bit far from Him. I was trying to find a way that I could sort this out and for the first time in a while I took my own advice and decided to start reading my bible. I’m going through Luke at the moment when I get the chance, trying for everyday and it’s gradually getting there, but I felt Jesus lead me to the psalms recently as well which is always exciting. I love the psalms, they’re so honest, and if you ask me (which you haven’t but you’ll get my answer anyway) they’re a very apt depiction of faith and mental illness. I’ve found I can really relate to them on this level, so praise God. He really does use everything!
My passage from Luke today was Luke 5, and as you can see I’ve made a cheeky collage of verses for this post. I was struck by just how willingly the disciples were to give up everything and follow Jesus. Luke doesn’t go into much detail, as you can see, but he doesn’t mention any kind of deliberation or worry or panic – just straightforward obedience and willingness to follow God. Wow. I have to say it really challenged me. Especially recently, feeling a bit like the lost son (or daughter, #equality) and really not picking up my cross each day as the saying goes. If anything, I have worried. And I’ve deliberated and I’ve decided a few times my ways are better or more appropriate for what I want, and I don’t remember in all the times I’ve read this bit in Luke the bit where we find out the disciples had to really think about it and rebel a bit before they went with Jesus. Sadly, I’m not one of the early disciples. But I am a disciple of Christ.
I’m not saying the early disciples were better than us or anything like that, hey, Jesus died for us all and that, but we can really learn from them. They were face to face with Jesus in a way that no one else in earthly history has been.
The verse from psalm 1 really got me too. I read it after my Luke passage and was smiling away to myself at how God works and as he was clearly speaking to me through both of these passages. I haven’t made the decision to get up and leave everything and walk in Jesus’ light instead of the ways of wickedness. I haven’t made the correct choice on this one, for this reason or that, it doesn’t really matter. The point is I haven’t made that choice to leave everything behind and go for it for Him recently. I don’t think ‘left everything’ is quite as literal for everybody as it was the disciples who literally left EVERYTHING to go on a road trip with Jesus (but hey, who wouldn’t?! – but I still think it’s something we should be aware of, God’s plans for us are bigger than the ones we have for ourselves!). But I definitely think with regards to sin and our own decisions and desires, definitely a call for all of us to consider.
I want to walk in the ways of the righteous – the ways of Jesus, and NOT the ways of the wicked. I know I will fail and trip up and get it wrong, but it’s what I do after this that counts; do I continue down the path that isn’t good for me or do I let Jesus pick me up, brush myself down, take hold of my cross and leave all of that behind?
Just something to think about I guess.
Peace and blessings x
annieanais: 